Fount of Every Blessing

Ok, I am going to try to lay out as clearly and thoroughly as possible the things that God was doing in my life last semester.

Long Beach

It more or less started one night in Long Beach. I went with 3 other girls from my class to see an art show. There were various artist, each in a different location scattered around the streets of downtown Long Beach. All the exhibites were somehow sound based or sound related.

One of the galleries caught our attention and we stepped inside. The room was loud, there was paint splattered everywhere and a video being projected up on the wall to the right. I was near the door, so as one of the girls I was with left the gallery she pulled me out with her. I was not sure what was wrong at first, but she was in tears, uncontrolably, and she kept asking, “what was that?” I tried to comfort her, but she kept crying. I felt helpless in the situation. I was the oldest one there, I knew responsibility fell to me, yet I had no words to speak. I could find nothing to say, nothing to explain what we had seen. It was not until the girl said something about a pig and a cross that it brought back to me what I had seen in the brief moment I had looked at the video screen. I do not feel the need to explain it here in detail. It was grafic, and blatantly blasphemous, a desecration of the cross. Once my friend had calmed down a bit, I knew we had to pray. What else can one do in a situation like that? We gathered to the side of the sidewalk, and I tried to pray, but my mind was confused, and I could not find words to speak, nor much hope. I was overwhelmed by the situation.

Needless to say, that put a damper on the rest of the night, and we did not stay much longer. But I could not shake what I had seen that night. I was frustrated with myself for being so ill-prepared for the situation, like a soldier caught sleeping. I was also mad, not at any person, but at the enemy, that he would or could even dare to do something like what I saw portrayed in the gallery. There was no way I could see something like that and not fight back. I would not take it laying down. My fury at the enemy woke me up and made me ready to fight, as God called me into action. Ephesians 6 came to life to me.

Torrey Conference

Torrey, a three day Bible conference at Biola, was coming up, about a week and a half after the Long Beach art show. There was a guy by the name of Jericho on campus who had gotten the idea of having a 24 hour prayer room during Torrey, so for a few days before hand he and some others were sitting outside the cafeteria getting people to sign up to lead prayer for an hour. As I said, God was calling me to action, so I knew my first step was that I needed to sign up to help. But still, I do not think of myself as much of a leader, so I only signed up for one hour. Everyone who signed up met the night before the conference to discuss what we were going to do, and to set up and decorate the room. We were each given a general topic to focus on for our time slot; my topic was worship. We prayed, then a few of us stayed behind to set up the room. It was 2 or 3 am when we finally finished.

Torrey was exception this year. Even coming into it, I had heard a lot of comments from other student that it would be very good, and I do not believe anyone was disappointed. All the speakers were right on the mark. My time to lead prayer was Thursday night, and Torrey ended on Friday. As thursday evening approached, I was sort of nervous about leading prayer, but I did not end up needing to do much, and God blessed me through it. It was simple a sweet hour of quiet worship before God.

The next day, Friday, was the last day of Torrey, and there were only two sessions, both in the morning. Erik Theonnes spoke for the first one, and was very good as usual. The last session was Mike Erre, who had been doing a series on purity. Usually a lot of people leave for the last day of Torrey, but not this time. The place was just as packed on that last day as it had been at the beginning of conference. At the end of his talk, Erre gave a call for people to come forward to repent of sin and be prayed for or whatever. People came forward, and not just a few. About 1/3 to 1/2 of everyone there came up for prayer, and even those left in their seats were weeping. People were crying out to God. I am not used to that intense of emotion, so my first reaction was to fight against it; but God just seemed to be telling me that He was working and I could not deny it or fight it. I have since come to the conclusion that emotions for emotion’s sake is empty, but when people come in contact with such an awesome, powerful God, as was happening that day at Biola, how could stong passions and emotions not flow out of that? Anyhow, if there were people in that gym who were not crying, they were few and far between. As the worship band came up and began to play, the atmosphere slowly shifted from one of weeping to one of joy. I worshiped that afternoon like I never have before, so open and vulnerable before a God so magnificent and powerful. A God who had just blown open my mental box of what was possible.

But God was not done with me yet, He still had more to show me that day. After session was lunch. And after lunch I decided to head over to the prayer room to see if I could help take thing down, and get a lot of my fabrics that had been used to decorate the room. The 24 prayer was supposed to end at noon, and by the time I got there it was 2 something, so I didn’t expect there to be people still in there praying. When I walked in there was a group sitting in a circle, about to pray for one another. I joined them, and one or two people came in after me joined in as well. It ended up being nine people total, and we ended up spending the next 3 hours in prayer. But it was not just prayer. Each person had a turn in the middle of the circle, and everyone else would gather around and pray for them, plus some of the people were prophesying as well. I believe the gift of prophecy is for today, not just the early church, but I never actually expected to see that kind of work of the Spirit in action, let alone have people prophesy over me. To think that such an all powerful God would single me out and have a message especially for me was too much from me to handle. As I saw different people take their turn in the middle, I didn’t know what to think. Everyone of them ended up in tears. Fear was holding me back. Finally, it was my turn. I moved into the center and bowed my head, and tears started to well up almost immediately. There was a pause of silence, then different ones started praying over me everything I had been praying for for the past year of so. Keep in mind I knew no one in that room except Jericho, and him I had only know for about three days. The things they sayed about me were things that even most my closest friends would not have know. I was affirmed in who I am, and who God made to be. Also, though a word picture, I was made aware of one of my greatest weaknesses, something that had been holding my back that I need to finally let go of. I wept like I never have before, but I was being cleansed from the inside out. At the time I did not realize it, buy I had been freed from a lot of fears and hang-ups that had been holding me back and preventing me from giving me fully over to God’s work.

So in one day God moved into my life in a way I had never seen before and tore down so may limitation I had put on Him, and fears and limits that I had put on myself, many of which I did not even know where there. He showed me who He is and let me experience His power in a way I could have never expected. I was so filled with joy I think I was worshiping Him for about two weeks straight after that.

Art

A little before Torrey I was given an art assignment by one of my teachers. We were to find a space on campus, and somehow “inhabit” that space for two weeks. We had to visit that space on a regular basis (daily was reconmended but not required) and alter it, so the work would progress slowly over a period of two weeks. We were to document what we were doing as we went…

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